For most of my career, I’ve lived in two worlds, the human one and the selling one. In the human world, people crave connection, understanding and a sense of belonging. In the seller’s world, teams are taught to chase numbers, say what the customer wants to hear and close deals. For too long, these worlds were treated as separate. They’re not. They never were.
If there’s one truth I’ve learned through the years, it’s this: sales isn’t about persuasion; it’s about resonance. The goal isn’t to convince someone of your value, it’s to remind them of their own. When your product, service or idea helps people see themselves and their ability to succeed more clearly, you’ve made the most powerful sale there is.
The New Definition of Sales
Selling is no longer the art of forcefully pitching features or relentlessly chasing deals. Buyers have evolved and no longer respond to that. Successful sellers today know how to sell with soul.
Selling with soul is centered in emotionally connecting and helping others achieve meaningful outcomes. It starts with being genuinely curious and wanting to help.
It requires listening deeply to customers and understanding their challenges, needs and aspirations. And with that understanding, guiding them toward solutions that genuinely improve their lives and their work.
Generosity Is the Secret Advantage
A well-planned and executed sales call is an act of generosity. When you put your experience and insights into the world, you create opportunities for mutual gain. You allow someone else to find the thing they’ve been searching for, and in return, you grow your own capacity to give. That’s the virtuous cycle of selling done right. The more value you put into the world, the more the world gives back.
So when you step into that next call or campaign, flip the script on your internal dialogue. Instead of asking yourself, “How can I close this deal?” ask yourself “What can I contribute here?” The difference might sound subtle, but it’s transformative. Contribution builds credibility. Credibility builds loyalty. And loyalty, more than leads, is what sustains a startup.
Connection Beats Conversion
Every buyer is a person. And all people want to feel seen and connected. As a seller, you can create this connection simply by being the best version of yourself.
Building genuine connection in your professional relationships requires the same actions as building genuine connection in your personal relationships. And all of these actions revolve around being a good, honest human being. Here are a few things you can implement right away.
Act with intention. Decide you want to be a trusted advisor for your buyers and for your company.
Genuinely listen. Set aside your agenda and really listen to what is being said so you can genuinely understand where someone is coming from.
Create a safe space. Don’t talk over or talk about other people on your calls. It will make them feel unimportant and leave them wondering what you say about them when they aren’t around.
Make a commitment. Act with generosity and the best interest of others at all times, not just when it’s easy or your quota is within reach.
Buyers are people, just like us. They have interests, goals and challenges. They have a ton of priorities weighing on their schedules and taxing their mental energy. They are looking for people to help them. Focus on helping and genuinely connecting, and conversion will take care of itself.
Authentic Image Is the New Influence
We spend so much time polishing our identity – things like logos, colors and pitch decks – that we forget that image isn’t something you design. It’s something you live.
Your brand image is a reflection of your collective behavior. How you respond under pressure, how you treat clients, how you handle mistakes. Identity is style, image is substance. And substance, not surface, creates emotional resonance.
When your sales and marketing teams live your purpose, your customers feel it. They don’t just see what you say, you show them who you are. Every conversation becomes a chance to prove your promise through your actions, not your adjectives
The Confidence to Contribute
Putting yourself out there takes courage. We live in a critical world, and vulnerability feels risky. But there’s no authenticity without exposure.
I often tell clients that courage isn’t the absence of fear, it’s the presence of conviction. When you enter conversations from a place of service, you stop worrying about rejection. The sale becomes about helping rather than hustling.
Selling is really a conversation between equals. One offers value, the other recognizes it. When that exchange happens with integrity, commerce becomes community.
A Call to Rehumanize Sales
The future of sales and marketing belongs to teams who understand this truth: people don’t buy products, they buy alignment. They buy from brands that reflect their values, from salespeople who see them as more than prospects.
What if, instead of chasing conversions, we chased connection? What if we measured success not only in quotas, but in the quality of relationships we build along the way?
I believe the next era of business will reward those who bring humanity back into the transaction. Empathy will be the new efficiency. Kindness will be the new currency.
We don’t need to sell harder, we need to mean more. Every great brand, every great salesperson and every great marketer eventually learns that the most powerful message you can send is the simplest one: I see you. I understand you. I’m here to help.
That’s what selling, in its soul, was always meant to be – not manipulation, but meaning. When we return to that, we don’t just close deals. We create belonging. And belonging, in the end, delivers the greatest ROI of all.
